Nigerians!!! Time to embrace "Na only you waka com".

By: Chimezie Anajama.

I went online, like I normally do, to check the latest news and
happenings in Nigeria; in the world. A glimpse on my facebook wall, I began to see funny hashtags; #there’sGod oo,
#diarizGod, #naonlyyouwakacome,
came at the end of friends’ posts. Curiosity beheld me. What was the meaning of these trending posts? Suddenly, they all cropped up. At the same time. It is more than coincidence. No. There must be something!

From a friend’s post to another, I scanned, looking out for a clue; clues, anything. Gradually,
I began to make headway, picking
up pieces here and there. Sewing
them together to make meaning.

The premise of the whole mystery; the first lady,
Patience Goodluck, has dropped
another grammatical bomb, on a
national television. And Nigerians can’t get enough of it. Like the oga-at-the-top fiasco. After some days, due to lack of internet services, a friend’s phone
came to my rescue. I finally
watched the first lady holding her
famous press briefing, as well as doling out series of rhetorical questions to her audience, with her tears choking up her speech.
I realized the reasons why people humored her.

Admittedly, the sarcasm that went with her speech was
too glaring to be ignored, they felt
she was acting out a script, her
incessant exaggeration of the
phrase “there’s God”, the variant of English she spoke, and finally, the peppering of her speech with
Pidgin English. All these, plus her previous outings, sparked a new snowball of rage from the language critics across the
country.
Quite alright, after that outing,
the first lady may’ve further
‘tainted’ her global image, made
Nigerian feel bad, and so on. But, I’ll still say, she is a strong woman, of whom I’ll always respect, because it is not easy to be real and confident despite her supposed grammatical
flaws.

Call me a supporter of
mediocrity, a mediocre, and so on. But let mecask some questions, why should how perfect she speaks English language be the only yardstick used to measure
her intelligence? What is wrong
with the Pidgin English she spoke?
Is not part of our identity and heritage as Nigerians? Are we not proud of it? Why should she be crucified for not being fluent in another man’s language?
With a good knowledge of her
indigenous language and poor
knowledge of English, is it enough for her to be seen as a caricature, pun, and be judged harshly?

Someone has said that to be very knowledgeable and fluent
in English language is quite noble.
But since she is not, does that
mean she is not intelligent? Or not fit to be the first lady?

I find it quite a myopic way of thinking when we use flimsy criteria as yardsticks of
judging others, even make sweeping conclusions about them with it, and finally, beat their drums so loud that at the
end, the real questions don’t get to be asked, and the real worries
become swallowed up by the noise
of these beating drums. Going back to memory lane, after the whole brouhaha of the
oga-at-the-top drama last year,
what came out of it? Did Mr. Shem
Obafaiye resign? What concrete difference did that interview made in N.S.C.D.C.? And what of the job racketeering that warranted the interview in the first place, any difference? I don’t think so. Like how it went down last year, we’re all likely to be carried away with our laughter this time. At the end, we won’t even know when we threw away both the baby and the
bathing water.

Again, I’ve noticed that these days, Nigerians are more British and
American than the real whites in
terms of English language. I write
not to condemn the language, but the attitude of Nigerian speakers. Have we ever asked ourselves, how will our indigenous languages grow with this attitude?
For the Igbos, it is even more
worrisome and pathetic. Already,
their language is predicted to be extinct in the next fifty years.

Someone has suggested that the first lady should employ the services of a translator
if she is not comfortable with
English, that is, she use her native
Ijaw while the translator takes care of the English aspect. Considering that many world leaders and beauty queens
do it, the suggestion sounds quite
pragmatic. But, is it not easier to
use our Pidgin English instead? I
mean, promote it, make it part of our official language; let it co-exist with English. The Gambia did it with her indigenous language, and the world did not come to an end.
No matter the degree of our pretense, our Pidgin English is a national symbol; heritage; our collective innovation;
part of our identity. Even the outsidevworld recognizes it, largely, through the effort of the entertainment industry. I noticed that these days, African Magic has begun to teach its viewers the language. They do a brief stint of the popular phrases to be used
before a Nigerian movie is shown,
especially if the movie is not subtitled. That is how serious they take it. Pidgin English is a strand of English which we have perfectly married and blended so well with our indigenous languages.

An anthropologist will always tell
you that for a society to grow; her
members should be able to borrow what they lack from the outside world, then domesticate and fine-tune it with their culture. Asian tigers are perfect case studies. They took western
technologies, blended it with their
cultural background, today, they’ve
become economic giants of the
world. Why can’t we do that to
pidgin?

Gratefully, the colonialists have
done the work of teaching us the
language, gave it a national outlook, we, on our part then fine-tuned it to our taste, but we’ve refused to accept it as part of the offspring of colonial times and culture contact. We accepted everything of theirs, apart
from the Pidgin English. Why?
These days, it has become the
mother tongue of many Nigerians. That is what many parents speak to their children often.

The uniqueness of this language lies in its simplicity and the fact that it is our own. We created this
language, we give this language life in our everyday activities, yet, we don’t want to give it an official
recognition, we don’t want to accept it as our creation; we’re ashamed of it even when
spoken in an official capacity. It
has become a “social reject”, a
bastard that is scorned at by the society that gave birth to it. But I think the real laughter should be on us, the owners. Yes, we’re the caricature, the pun, not Patience Goodluck. We’re the joke and tragedy. For not accepting
our own.

My humble advice to anyone that detests the first lady’s variant
of English; next time you hear her
speak, quickly grab your pen and
paper, write to the presidency and
Ministry of Education to make
Pidgin English part of our official language. Let it rub shoulder with English. It will save us all the energy